Lady of Zorro --> behind the enigma

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Separation is not the end of a marriage. Sometimes couples have to part ways to gather themselves, to be able to think clearly, reunite with their inner beings, realize things, etc. Eventually some would end up going back to each other's arms again, while others dont and end up pairing with someone else. In that case, it is extremely painful for the one who is expecting and hoping for a reconciliation.

It is not wrong to expect and hope that one day your spouse would come back, no matter how long or how difficult the daily struggles would be. It is a natural emotion of a person who sincerely loves.

The Scriptures says "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." (1 Cor. 13:4-7) This passage tells us how great it is to love and be loved.

For those who desires a "second chance" or a reconciliation, put hardwork in developing yourself to become a better person (better than the one your spouse used to know), repent and keep the faith! Pray harder than ever for God listens to your every cry.

Try to ponder on these living words...

The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their cry;
The face of the LORD is against those who do evil, to cut off the memory of them from the earth.
The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
A righteous man may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all;
He protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken. (Psalms 34:15-20)

In one way or another, these living words will soothe you and bring you peace.

Labels: faith, love, marriage, separation

Monday, October 15, 2007

J'écrit cet poème pour mon ami.

In this life where everyone seems blind
Friends are hard to find
Some appears to be real
But they require you a big deal.

In times of richness and ecstasy
They stick around and enjoy some iced tea
But when sorrow strikes
Like lunatics, they ran for their lives.

In my case
This one person I did not chase
She remained beside me
All the time I lost my sanity.

One time, I left her
I thought our friendship will not get better
But times had passed, she was still there
I realized then, I am so cruel.

Somehow it never occurred to me
It was another test of sincerity
Our bond grew stronger
It ended up we became together.

Now I can say
In our hearts we both feel this way
Our friendship is bound to last
Even after we come back to dusts.

-anne

I wrote this on our fisrt year anniversary, June 21, 2005.

Dexter

He is jolly
He is funny
He makes me happy
Whenever I’m lonely.

In times of strife
In this difficult life
He gives me hope
That I’ll survive

He fills the air with his scent and flair
Never leaves without a fixed hair
His smile and laughter
Make odd days even brighter

I am weak and yet he is strong
He suffers most when I go wrong
I had confusions and frustrations
But with him, I now have direction

Patience is his virtue
Love drives him to be true
Forever, he’ll be in my heart
Even if I die, we would never be apart.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

My Timothy

Timothy, my baby
You are most precious to mommy
When you came to me,
My whole life is in glee.

Timothy, my darling
My love for you is never ending
I’ll always be by your side
To protect you and be your guide.

Timothy, my only one
I thank God for you, my son.
Because of you, I feel so blessed
My life now is no longer a mess.

Many times I dreamt for peace
To come to me and put me at ease.
I also wished for death to come
To end my grief and leave me numb.

But then… you came…
Sudden joy filled the pain
Because of you I kept up my hope
Because of you, I hold on to the Lord.

You are my life now
To love you and protect you, I have vowed
Never will I let you feel the pain,
The agony that has kept me several years insane.

My love for you will never end
Up to my last breath, I will hold your hand
My son, my blood, my flesh
Timothy, my ever dearest.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Breaking the news

It was Sunday night(August 13) and I was very eager to do a pregnancy test. I bought a PT pack from Watson and as soon as I got home, I dropped a sample of my you-know-what....then after few minutes, two lines appeared! At first, I did not believe what I saw because the other line was not that clear. Also, I'm used to getting negative results in the past... I showed it to my husband and he was also confused because of the not-so definite line... The following day before I went to work, I dropped by at Mercury and bought another pack of PT kit. I did my test at our office toilet and it gave the same result, two lines, the other was not so clear. That's the time I told myself that I am really pregnant... I was so happy!!! I showed the results to my two best buddies at work (the would-be ninangs, Peewee and Friendship!) We were very happy and excited. I texted my husband about the news and of course, he was overjoyed!!! I started texting almost everybody.. my family in Baliuag, my kumares, our ninongs and ninangs, relatives and close friends. Grabee!!!It was really a very bright and promising day!! Everyone wished me and my baby well!!!

First Check-up

August 15(Tuesday)--Dex and I went to see the OB-Gyne the following day (August 15). She is Dr. Arlyn Eming. She has been a very good OB to my 2 married cousins. Anyway, when we got there, her assistant took my BP, weight, date of last menstruation, etc. I was not subjected to another PT test since I already had 2 tests with positive results!

The doctor informed me that my baby's gestation age was 5 weeks and 5/7 days. My expected due date is on April 13, 2007. She also gave me prescriptions of what vitamins and other supplements to take.. like of course.. Anmum!

She also told me that I would be undergoing several tests on my next visits, like urinalysis, blood test and ultrasound to check if the baby is inside the uterus or not.

After my first check-up, I had a nice feeling that I would be ok as well as my baby. The doctor was so nice and accomodating, very patient in answering all my questions and most of all, doesn't asks to much for a fee.

I also learned that it is important to remember the dates of your period when you are trying to get pregnant. Having the exact date of your first day of last menstrual period could help your doctor estimate the age of your baby and of course, your expected due date. However, if you missed counting, the doctor could send you to a radiologist for an ultrasound. The ultrasound can determine the age of the fetus.

Next Visit to the OB

September 16 (Saturday)-- Dex accompanied me to the OB. I was so excited because I was almost 2 months pregnant. I remember the doctor told me I could possibly start hearing fetal heartbeats on the 2nd month of my pregnancy and onwards.

I was asked to lie down and she used this some kind of a Doppler machine to listen to my baby's heart beat. Unfortunately, my excitement died because there was no heartbeat! I was so worried, I almost cried. But my doctor calmed me down. She said, it might be too early to hear his heartbeat. She did other observations on me, like gently pressing my belly. She then noticed an unusual bulge which she thought of as an ovarian cyst or something not rightfully present inside me. I was more than worried at that time. I could feel my tears are starting to fall but I tried to hold it back and be calm. Then I remember I was constipated! I told her about that and somehow it gave me and the doctor a hope that it was just a piece of stucked shit! She then prescribed a laxative for 3 days and required me to undergo a transvaginal ultrasound on the 3rd day to check if there is really a cyst.

Ultrasound Results

September 19(Tuesday)--At last, after 3 days of dealing with stomach cramps and frequent toilet visits in the morning because of Dulcolax, I could finally find out what else is inside me! I went to the radiologist alone this time.

I wasn't aware of the procedure for transvaginal ultrasound. What I heard from my officemates is that a machine would be place on your belly and an image of whatever will be seen on a monitor. I really thought it was that simple. Then I overheard one of the attendants explaining to one of the patients undergoing the same procedure, that a machine would be inserted to her v-----! Of course, I freaked out! I even cried because, the doctor who would examine the patient while that MACHINE was inside her was a male doctor/radiologist! I was so terrified. I texted my husband and he told me to find another clinic with female doctors. I almost did that. I talked to the attendant and she immediately understood my dilemma. She smiled and politely told me that there is a female radiologist who could do the procedure for me. Whew! I was relieved!

It was now my turn! The lady radiologist was very kind to me. The procedure turned out smoothly and she even gave me an extra copy of my baby's first picture!! (FOR FREE!!!)

Our First Encounter

I can never forget the first time I saw my very own child moving vigorously as if he was making pasikat to me! I can't describe it. The feeling was so perfect! (parang langit!!) I cried and cried because of so much joy (even until now, I feel the same way!) Napakasaya ko, walang paglagyan ang sayang naramdaman ko!!

That was the time I came to realize a lot of things! I promised that I would do everything to protect my child. I would disregard my feelings even if it meant swallowing my pride so my baby won't be under stress. I would always prioritize his needs especially now. Lahat gagawin ko para sa kanya!

Then, of course, I never failed to ask the lady radiologist if my baby was healthy...Healthy daw!! His heartbeat was doing very good!

I will always remember how I saw him for the first time. It will always be in my heart and in my mind. This is the happiest day of my life!

I love you so much baby!!!

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Last July 7 (Friday), I received a phone call from an agent of City Limits. At first, I thought that this company is part of CITIBANK, just like CITIFINANCIAL. The agent told me that since I am a member of CITIBANK, they would give me a VIP privelege card wherein I would be entitled of priveleges, OF COURSE! She told me in a very convincing manner, that with the VIP card, they will give me a life insurance and medical/dental reimbursements. As far as I remember, reimbursement is up to 25% of the total amount of medical/dental expenses (i.e. consultation fees, medicine, etc.). Guess what the best part is! The VIP card entitles my immediate family and my husband's family for the same benefit excluding the life insurance.

During our conversation, she told me that I would be charged through my credit card a one-time fee of PhP4,700 as payment for the said insurance. AND as long as I have a good credit standing with CITIBANK, I will remain entitled to said benefits. To me, it would mean FOREVER, because I don't intend to run away from my obligations with a credit card company.

She also told me that the payment of said amount would be very easy since I can ask the CITIBANK to convert it into deferred installments of up to 12 months. In short, I would be paying 392.00 pesos. If only I was able to compute it myself that very time, I would have known that she is making a fool out of me. I asked her if I would be charged of interest once I opted for the deferred payment. The BITCH told me that I would be charged of NOTHING more than PhP4,700. She told me that monthly payment would cost me around 400 plus! See! There is really something wrong!!!

I felt like I was hypnotized or something. Our conversation was nonstop and I thought she have explained it very well. I was convinced and I believed that the offer was very GOOD and worth the 4,700 (kasi nga, isip ko it will be FOREVER!). SO, when she asked me of my credit card number, I immediately get my card and gave her my credit card number as well as details of family members.

That afternoon when my husband called me at the office, I was so excited to tell him about CITY LIMITS and what transpired between me and the agent. I really thought he would like it because his family would also benefit from it. To my surprise, my husband did not like it. He asked me questions the agent have not clarified to me. I really got confused and so worried. That's the time when I realized that I should have not confirmed anything to anyone if I have not brought it up to my husband yet, especially when it comes to financial decisions.

On July 10 (Monday), when I got to office, I called CITY LIMITS and asked for the cancellation of our transaction. I talked to the company's manager and told her that the agent did not clearly explained the details and that I was made to believe that it was a lifetime insurance. I explained to her that the agent did not discussed it vaguely and I was not given the whole picture. After a long paliwanagan, the manager approved the cancellation and informed me that they would charge me PhP900 for the delivery fee and other expenses for the kit they prepared for me.

Hay!!!! That week was so stressful. It even bankrupt me! Syempre, I paid for my mistake...(hay, sayang talaga...)

Geez, I've learned my lesson!

1. Don't accept offers through phone calls. AGENTs can be very tricky.

2. When making any deal, make sure it's in BLACK and WHITE. And READ it thoroughly.

3. Give importance to your spouse's opinion.

4. When you make mistakes, learn from it and get over it... MOVE ON.

5. Always ask for the Lord's guidance so He would give you a sound mind.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Last Saturday (June 10), me and some of my officemates went to White Beach, Puerto Galera to spend the weekend. We took the Alps Bus liner (fare from Cubao to Batangas port is PhP 153.00) and left the terminal at 3am. I sat beside Peewee. Both of us were very sleepy because we barely slept that night. We reached Batangas Port at around 6am. I was not able to make tanghod at the view because I just slept during the entire travel. Gee, I was expecting a very chaotic old port because that was the case years ago. I think I was 14 years old then when I went to Calapan, Oriental Mindoro and the port was kinda old and shabby. But now, it was unexptectedly beautiful, well-maintained and organized. The vendors wore uniformed shirts

The Arrival
When we get to the port, we paid for the boarding fee of PhP10.00 and the roundtrip fare of PhP 280.00. Our ferry was named Blue Penguin. Anyway, the trip was peaceful because I happened to sleep peacefully. When I get to open up my eyes... we were in White Beach already... The beach was so beautiful and looks very lively. There are lots of people, bazaars and bars... big beautiful houses to rent... When I set my foot on the sand and felt its warmth (its also wet, FYI!), I know I am going to enjoy my stay in that island! I really wished my brave and handsome Zorro is there too. Unfortunately, he was out there again for the people of Ortigas!!!

Money Matters
Anyway, we billeted at White Beach Lodge (PhP2,500/room_family size). The room was very cozy and comfortable. It has tv with cable, airconditioning unit and a refrigerator. It has 2 double-sized bed. Only it has no kitchen because you were supposed to eat at its little resto downstairs. The food at the resto was also delicious and affordable. We tried the pancit bihon guisado at only PhP 60.00 and its good for 3 people to share. Soda drinks at 15 pesos per bottle, coffee is at 15 pesos per cup. The prices are not really bad. IT was really affordable... and when we visited the bazaars.. I never thought the shirts are so cheaply priced and has very good quality. I bought a sando shirt for my nephew Aaron, it cost me around 65pesos. a shirt for my Zorro is only 95 pesos with free branklet (bracelet and anklet-in-one). I bought a beach short in red and gray camouflage prints for only (100 pesos), and most importantly my new pair of two-piece bathing suit at only 200! Very nice bargain!! (Oh by the way, the bling-blings range from 35-400 depending on the design, materials used, and of course the location of the store.) Advice: The farther the store from the main part of the beach shore, the cheaper the goods are.

Nightlife in White Beach

It was night time... the bars are open and people are scattered almost everywhere eating, drinking, shopping, strolling. The nightlife in White Beach is so lively and full of fun. Our group enjoyed the loud music while we were dancing at the shore. Kevin, Peewee and I had ourselves tattoed (henna tattoo, PhP100). We even had daring pictorials that night at the far end of the beach where there are very very few people around.

By the way, you can do your shopping at night because the bazaars are still open until midnight... they tend to lower their prices when they were about to close.

Near-death Experience

The next morning (June 11), Peewee and I were enjoying our second dip at the pampang when this super lakas very huge consecutive waves hit us both while we were unprepared. I was facing the wave while Peewee was facing the other way... woooosshhhh.... the waves hit us.. I was outbalanced and my back instantly hit the seafloor . Itried to get up but the waves are too big so I gobbled up some sea water. I was really struggling to get up but the waves are so strong that it hit me again... by that time I was like a bowling ball getting its way to strike the Kanal! Peewee, on the other hand, was doing her own stunts (see her blog for details). Grabee!!!!.. by the time we were in our sane composure... both of us have the voodoo/tsunamic hairstyle. I got scratches at the back and in my arms. Peewee has wounds on her feet and palm. I sprained my neck and right shoulder blade. Really.. going to the beach alone is very dangerous! but if you want to know how it feels to be a victim of tsunami... go straight to Puerto Galera!

On Leaving P.G.

My short stay in Puerto Galera is truly a fun-filled experience. Despite the scratches and the sprain I got, I enjoyed the waves. Actually, I am not fond of beaches because some beaches have this stingy feeling when you swim (they say its the jellyfishes!) But this time I really enjoyed it especially the sand. I love walking on it. In fact when I get back to Manila, I still feel like I'm walking on the sand.

This time, I did not sleep during the ferry ride. It took us about an hour to reach Batangas Port. I was able to appreciate the beauty of the sea and the islands you'll see along the way. At the port, you will be met by vendors selling pasalubong. There are carinderias in case you left the beach without having lunch or something to eat (just like in my case). However, if you are quite maselan, in all the eateries I have scanned for something nice to eat, I always find langaw inside the food display box. So, think twice! (OR MAYBE, it was just a bad day for me that's why there are flies everywhere!)

Well, that's my Puerto Galera adventure!!! Ciao!

Monday, June 05, 2006

I have two very close friends in the office. We used to do things that we no longer do now since I married Zorro... Both of them were pretty, fashionable, intellectual, very kind and understanding. I am very lucky to have them both because they never failed to be there for me whenever I am aching or in Cloud 9!

FRIENDSHIP: We call each other Frienship! She's the one who helped me launch my blogger (thanks a lot Friendship!). She encourages me to do things that would improve myself and our lives (Dex and mine). She also hates my in-laws... I really miss those times I slept over at her apartment. We would chat all night long, trying on beauty accessories, food tripping (although she was on a diet then), reading fashion magazines and talking about OUR men. I also miss going to the mall with her. I remember the first time we were together in a mall, we tried on some wigs!!! There is also one time when she accompanied me to face my worst ENEMY-- (Daisy D! as in Daisy DUCK!)

I believe our relationship as friends is strong enough to withstand whatever trials the future has in stored for us. At first, we started as enemies and turned into real, sincere friends. With that, we have accepted each others weaknesses and strength.

PEEWEE: This gal is really one of a kind! very sensitive and always strives to be better in all aspects (I mean in almost everything... from work to making the best coffee in town!) She is my lunch buddy. She has this unique nature of being able to distinguish the taste of flames in a roasted burger patty...My husband and I admires her tastebuds.

Pews (as i call her) and I are mall lovers. We love going to the malls, fitting rooms and eating out after our French class. (Trivia: we bought the same kind of statement shirt once-I love my attitude problem.)

I also slept at their house once when i was very sick and she took care of me... together with Tita Inday. Peewee and I also had fights and we definitely make up for each other (its normal between friends). We can not stand being angry with each other for a long time. She is very important to me just like Precy. They are the ones I never dream of losing in my life.

Its really fun reminiscing those happy days with your friends. One thing these friends of mine have in common: They are both SHOPAHOLIC and they love FRENCH!!! Ohh.. and they have tons of shoes!!!!